Ebony writes about the day her best friend discovers that Ebony is in foster care. “The last words I ever heard her utter were that there was ‘something wrong with my kind,’ and I didn’t deserve to go to school ‘with normal kids.’ “ Ebony remembers that from that moment on, she was determined to build an iron box around her heart. “I would not be taken by anyone’s kindness or friendship,” she writes.

But all that changes when Ebony meets Allen, a true friend. Allen accepts Ebony wholeheartedly for all that she is, and Ebony comes to realize that “There are still some human beings left out there.”

Discussion—Stereotypes of Foster care Youth

On a deeper level, this is a story about the stereotypes and stigmas that are sometimes associated with being in foster care. Ebony recalls that when her classmates learned she was in foster care, they said things like: “You’re not like us,” and “We don’t like your kind.” She believed that in their eyes, she would forever be labeled as a “Foster Child.”

Many foster youth experience some sort of stereotyping simply because they’re in foster care. Have your residents read this article quietly, then write for five to ten minutes about a time when they hesitated revealing to someone (a teacher, friend, boyfriend or girlfriend, friend’s parent, etc.) that they were in foster care.

Ask for volunteers to read these aloud. Move their personal stories into a larger discussion about stigma and foster care with questions such as: Why would someone hesitate to tell that he or she is in foster care? What are some of the stereotypes that some people associate with foster care? What are some ways to deal with these stereotypes? When does someone feel safe in telling that he or she is in foster care?